SingleLicious

Hi Love,

How's your week end? 

May u get refreshed after watching TV all day or maybe went to the beach on your free day =)

So, I have been busy lately because I am on a new job with a strict office hour and even more time to learn my new job in finance (with my engineering background). I take a fair amount of pressure in my new job, I love it though even yes, it is draining my energy. I am not in denial that in this ‘hard’ time, I need and I love to have someone to you know support me not just in a friendly way but also in a romantic way =p 

It's been a long time since I had a boyfriend or partner or whatever we called it. In that none boyfriend time, I was of course ( =p ) got involved with some guys. Nicely done at first but then it also affected me sometimes because some relationship had turned into something that I really had no idea what it was and got me to think more than it should (a fun relationship). I still have my heart in a right place I guess, that’s why I used some of my energy left into those ‘relationship’. 

What came into me was have I just once in a period time of my 'grown up' life ever really single...

Well I realized that I was hardly really single for a long period of time. I remembered when I was really is single, it was the real SingleLicious time for me. I enjoyed the time when I freely went wherever I like without being bothered with questions. I loved it when I just focused on something without weighted with ‘a relationship thought’. I just enjoyed me with my family and friends and nothing to worry about. Relationship sometimes can be fun and sometimes can be a burden to us. I had no fear at that time, fear from my own thought, would I really have someone to called my lover or whatsoever. Turns out that fear comes to me, sneaking up and lay down there in my head.

I am very much knowing that people surrounding me in my age has the idea about marriage, but doesn’t every person has their own way and time to come to this idea? (me and myself conversation). For me, this is me time to focus on my career, and multitasking is not a good idea for now. What’s so wrong with planning my next couple of years without any kind of romantic relationship. Maybe this idea will not so hard for men but very hard for women. Women do need affection and touch etc more than men.  

Ohhh believe me, I am so sick talking about what should be and what shouldn’t be in my romantic life. Sometimes I need to take a rest from all the drama and hopefully could see clearly next time. Don’t you agree?! A lot to do than to think about whom to loved or am I will be loved, when we will or when we will not. Let it go and flow like the wind kissing your face lol. The point is, let’s try the real taste of SingleLicious and take the benefit and good feeling from it. Too much think will drained us, just bring fear and doubt to our self.

Less is more =D

Ciao,

Yui

Rumor has it -Imaging-

Hi Love,

Short Story : I have this old friend (We can call her Y) whose four years older than me. She is single and live alone (she had a cute cat yes lol). She traveled to many countries in Europe and some in Asia. So one day one of my other friend (let's call her X) asked me where she's got the money from, what's her job, since Y is not working in the company and never talk or share about her business, and X giving me this kind of negative tone and facial expression when she asked it (maybe just maybe she ever thought that Y is you know, doing a 'bad' job whatsoever). Then yeah I explained to X that Y has investing some money and she comes from rich family that she doesn't have to think about spending money to other than herself.

Rumor has it. We act and react to something, sometimes, considering what will be if it's going out and become a rumor, as a kind of social judgment towards an action, or maybe we are unaware of people’s judgment. Believe me, at some point people do judging.

Well stepping backward a bit, we sometimes confuse with our own image, who are we, what will we become, what will I like, what will I do and so on. This is when a rumor took a part, how is it you want to be your rumor become? I think this is (I cannot say this is an easy way) a simple way to establish an image or for our self (first). Isn't it fun to think what people will say about us (she's a beautiful, smart and full of responsible person bla bla bla).

Then now we know what a better person we will become.

It is hard to make people believed that we changed to a better persons, it is even harder to convince our self that we do changed. Our heart or our head had changed but do our action had changed also? The action is what people see, making an image and well a bit rumor maybe. So we want our action in tune with our heart and our head, that forming an image for people to see.

This is not about impressing or lying to other, making a two faces or probably more. This is about proving to our self that we building this image with effort to become a better person we want to be, and it is nice actually, to have people talking a good thing about us even if we feel we are not that good, but still this imaging useful for encouraging us go to do more and more goodness (or maybe a little tricky imaging lol).

So you want to make a colleague to see that you are a hard worker person, then become it. Show that every task is finished with an A label. You hate sexist in the office, then show them you could do other gender's job (even if you hate it a bit ;) ) and make sure this imaging hit the right person. You want to be a loveable person, then try it, speak nicely, caring to others. Impressing someone you love? then doing something that he or she will like (remember, just a good thing =P and do not leave your identity behind, be yourself).

Basically we are doing an imaging first of who we are, what we like people to see, then doing something based on this image, in tune with our heart and head. Please, let people judge, it gives us more colorful life I believed.

Is my words too messed up to read? Hahaha well I’m not good at telling what exactly going on in my head and I want to forming an image that I am a good writer, so….But instead, this is what comes out from me, please judge me =D I know that somebody get it, what I meant in this topic (self comforting). I think peoples come to thought about this, I am just a reminder for others and especially for myself .

It is not all bad telling a good lies about our self right? as long as we try to improving a way up there (self judging). Forming an image you liked, changing slowly an image that you don’t like. The power of imaging, Yayyy!!! =D

Some people will appreciate what you did and it will encourage us to do more, but some people will mock your effort of course. We know exactly what we would say to haters, “So what, rumor has it!”

Ciao,

Yui.

  

Salute

Hi Love,

It's been a while for me not to write something, cos i haven't been in the mood lately. I consider my life is mess up cos still haven't been accomplished my goals, even now i am considering to stop my fingers from typing. 

My ideas stuck in my head full of craps like : this words are rubbish, silly and lack of information for others, my bad English grammar and so on. Gosh why my own thought seems to betrayed myself. I have made my self to commit writing regularly but instead of pouring words into pages, i kept it all just walking in my head. 

The biggest challenge to making a progress is laying inside me. Why do i care so much with people think about my work more than my own opinion? I mostly recognized my mistakes or my unfulfilled goals, but sometimes i drawn into it instead of making a solutions cos everything mixed up in my head.

At the moment i ignore my negative thought and i started to write immediately. I managed to dosing up my egoistical side of me. I don't care if me myself laughing at me, i just stick to my plan to write something for me and let nature take its course lol. I still have a little laugh in my head for me but i have this gracious satisfying feeling that i could beat my own scary thought.

May the happiness walking with us. Salute!

Ciao,

Yui.

Unrequited Love -You answer for yourself-

Hi Love,

What is your feeling when you experienced unrequited love? And by the way, for how long?

%$$@*&*&@^*@!!!! Yeah that the answer. All negative feelings, you named it. Negative feeling toward other and or to our self. The worst case of an unrequited feeling is to your ex or to someone that used to have fling or history with.  

Too much to think about, too messed up to feel about. Put a song to your feeling. Mine was, I played the sad poor song about rejection, then move to self power song, and ended up with love our self song.

Why and why this is happened. Move back to our years of life, how many unrequited love or failed relationship we had. Is that something to do with me as a person, incapable of making a relationship, or we are not loveable enough for other, or maybe my love not great enough for them?

Wow wow, hold that thought. Do we have a bad feeling and thought about our self when we hit by a rejection from others? Do we hit back our self to cause and allow this thing in our life? Whose fault is that?

Play back again the self power song, is it contain kind of ‘revenge’ lyrics and suddenly we feel good about it, that we could show the world, show to friends, and show him or her that someday they will love us back and regret their rejection because someday we will maintain more power and self esteem and whatever that cause us more loveable and appropriate for them?

I think there’s a pattern here. Unfulfilled expectation, despair and friends, feeling bad about our self, arguing inside head about this and that, then we have enough of it and the end result is depend on our self.

Yeah my friends, this is life, up and down, sometimes we prepared for it, sometimes we already predicted, sometimes we unsure, sometimes we even have no idea about it.

What’s in my control? My life, my action reaction, my thought, my feeling, my effort, and my faith.

I don’t know why bad stuff happened. For some people it is God’s way to make us more powerful, more capable to live our life. For some people it’s just a color of life.

Have you ate all the life stories book, a psychological advice, self empowerment videos, even friends an family’s advice? Do we learn something from it? Why we still have a bad feeling, rolling inside head over and over again?

STOP NOW. Enough is enough. We feel, we think, we learn and we do something now. Doesn’t matter again what happened. All is just a history. From now on we could love our self more, looking what is good for our life. Stop questioning when we don’t have the answer now. I believe time will send us something, not the answer we wanted maybe, or maybe it is the answer we waiting for, or be ready to accept that there’s no answer. Now is a good time for let it go, be gone because I already suffered from it. Be gone because I need to love me more than questioning somebody’s feeling for me. How I feel and how I think about me is the most important thing in my life. If they don’t like it, then let them go.

We may don’t have love and attention from the one we love, but we know that we have our self, we know that we love our self for years. Why we should stop being happy when something is not running as what we like? Isn’t it life?

Do not let the unrequited love happened to our self.

I put a smile on my face and now i know the answer

Ciao,

Yui

Mood Booster - I love Me

Hi Love,

How are you today Guys, i hope you are all in a good mood. Yeah this time i am curious for 'The Mood'. 

I woke up this morning, suddenly thought about many problems of mine and BAMM!!! i felt sad and less-energy. I went to my laptop and started to search for the term MOOD. 

The first thing i opened was Wikipedia. You could check at : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mood_%28psychology%29 . It said that a mood is basically less specific, less intense, and less likely to be triggered by a particular stimulus or event than emotion. 

Well from what i have read, correct me if i am wrong, when i am not in an emotional condition (I will resume about emotional condition later based on a book by a famous Paul Ekman), than it should be a mood that occurs in 'my feeling', whether it's a casual happiness or casual sadness (i use casual for less intense feeling) or maybe almost zero feeling (nor happy or sad feeling). 

So the most of my feeling is filling with how is my mood today. People who stress out in life have a constant bad mood in days and people who have a satisfying life according to their standard should be have a good mood in most of their days. 

Unlike the emotion that is mostly trigger by something that we know, a mood is smoothly sneak up for unknown exact caused. We could point that an anger is caused by something specific, meanwhile a mood is hard to addressed. Ask to our self, i don't know why i am in a good mood or a bad mood today (even when i was thinking about many problems of mine, i could countered my thought with 'i already know my problem before today and i still had a good mood' so basically i don't know what's triggered my bad mood today).

Since we could just sniffed for what causing a bad mood , may be we could also sniffed for what causing a good mood. Many sources talk about mood booster, something that could affect our mood into a good mood, a happy feeling. I my self believe in complexity of a human being. There's always cause and effect, everything is linked in. My brain, my body, my food, are link into my feeling. But i think, think simple and just enjoy everything is the basic guidance for a mood booster. I resumed from what i read and from my experienced what we can do to boost this good mood, and i try some of it this morning =)

Tricks your senses is the first step : 


1. Sing it : Sing a nice song that make us remember a good day of our life, or maybe just an easy listening song with a 'happy' music tone, or maybe a song that bring out the stress by shouting out loud the lyrics. A Crazy song from Aerosmith does the trick for me.

2. Sip and eat it, don't forget to smell a scent of it :  Brew a cup O Tea, Jasmine or whatever scented tea you like. I actually prefer a coffee than a tea. People said it's not good enough for a mood booster but i think just drink our favorite drink! Orange Juice also great to sip for bring out an energy. Chocolate and ice cream good for release some enzymes or whatever chemical brain that makes us calmer. Please just enjoy when you crushed that ice cream, do not think about weight gain lol. I remember had a bag of chocolate to helped me calmer when i stressed out facing my high school graduation's exams.


3.  Move your body or stay still : Just take a  walk around neighborhood, or dancing while looking at the mirror and put a smile face (this works out well for me). Helping Mom watering the flowers also great trick (maybe for woman lol). Take a nice warmth bath with aromatherapy and put some candles. The stay still trick : For some people, just stay sit and relax or sleeping may works. Lack of sleep hour also could cause a bad mood. So take your pillow Guys!!


4. Open the eyes : Look at something beautiful. Browse a website full of handsome guy pictures ;) , or whatever picture you like, an art work or a beautiful home & garden design . Put some colorful clothes of yours. Red and orange are giving us more energy.





5.  Feel it like you meant it : Touch your bed sheet and feel it, the smoothness and warmth that help us resting at night. I am not encouraged you to become crazy lol but just feel anything usual in our eyes and make it become something special that we gratitude of it's existences.

It's all in your brain :

The scientist said that our brain could trick each other. My brain could trick my brain?! yes!!! I think what people trying to do just like things above is basically trigger our senses into tricking our brain and brain will release some i don't know what chemicals that makes us happier. But if all of it still not enough or too lazy to practice ;) than just trick our brain directly by think about most happier or most beautiful things in our life. take a time for it and meant it, feel it. Direct our minds into something good in our life. Meditation is good for 'getting to know' our inner self. Do not forget to feel gratitude for our beautiful life we live, friends and family who always support us. No matter what problems we have met, we still live and somehow managed to survive and trying to bring happiness into our live. That's when we love our self.





 I LOVE ME !!!






Ciao,
Yui

Let's Get Started

Hi Love,

I wondered so many guideline, so many words, so many things we could use as guidelines for ourself, for better life. We used to have tips n tricks about anything to "STAY ALIVE" but just stay in mind. I Love Me blog may help me and you guys to love ourself more, in a positive way. Hopefully to share stories, love, passions, knowledge, everything to help us stay IN LOVE with ourself first.

LET"S GET STARTED with I Love Me.

Ciao,
Yui